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Parenting advice especially for single parents, with op 10 lists of how you can parent your children, and how you can deal with the ex-partner who is not prepared to learn and apply your parenting advice.

How to Have a Good Parent-Child Relationship

How to Have a Good Parent-Child Relationship

Having a good parent-child relationship is something everyone strives for, both on the parental side and also on the child’s side. But it involves much more than just being popular with your children, because a truly great a good parent-child relationship is like a teabag… It’s true color comes out when it’s in hot water! Top 5 Mistakes that Stop Singles Having a Good Parent-Child Relationship As a single mom or dad it is certainly possible to have a good parent-child relationship, but many single parents make some classic mistakes in this area.   1. Trying to Be Their Friend It is great to love your child and wonderful to relate well to them. It is also great when they share even their most intimate thoughts with you because they trust you. However, your children do not need you as a friend, they need you as a parent. You can still relate well to them, love them and have them trust you, but it cannot be as a friend it needs to be someone they look up to and respect, and that’s what parenting is about. At some point your teenage son or daughter will choose to be with their friends over you, and that’s okay. The worst thing you can do is to force your friendship on the, especially in the company of their other friends. Love them, be close to them, be absolutely trustworthy, but don’t be a friend be mom or dad. 2. Manipulating Them Singles in general and particularly single moms are very prone to manipulating their children. In a healthy relationship, if you want them to do something you need to simply ask honestly and openly, not manipulate them or use a guilt trip to have your children obey you. You may feel like the ...

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The Single Parent Families Lifestyle

The Single Parent Families Lifestyle

The single parent families lifestyle is a unique and interesting one. This is especially true in the case of shared custody, because it is almost like the children are living a double life.  This lifestyle is not easy for adults, let alone for a child, so the pressures on single parent families and their lifestyle is often greater than on other families, even if both parties love the kids.   The Duality of the Single Parent Families Lifestyle   Living completely different lives with mom or dad during the week is taxing on everyone, especially on the child.  Yet it is a lifestyle that has to be faced if you truly love them, and you need to do the best for your child and the family.   Here are three areas you can work on to try and minimize the potentially destructive nature of the single parent families lifestyle…   Divide and Conquer Parents Kids are great at doing this, especially in a messy or nasty separation situations, and this can be a difficult lifestyle to deal with.  Kids are experts at dividing and conquering the parents even in regular families, playing mom off against dad to get what they want.  This is even more extreme for separated parents because the parents are already divided!   The solution: Start communicating with your ex and present a united front on the key issues.  If you can’t stand each other, it’s time to make a decision that you love the kids enough to put them first and at least start texting!  If you communicate you can make sure that the child is not playing one of you off against the other and avoid a tragedy people and unaware couples in your situation face daily!   Disciplining verses Fun Another unique single parent ...

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Top 20 Funny and Profound Quotes on Parenting

Top 20 Funny and Profound Quotes on Parenting

While there are many quotes on parenting across the internet, some of them I have found to be either distasteful or inappropriate, and that’s why for our website we have included our own quotes in parenting.   Some are funny, some are profound, but all of them have something that resonates with parents and the sometimes overwhelming task of bringing up children.   So here are our favorite Top 20 quotes on parenting   Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them. – P.J. O’Rourke Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands. – Anne Frank Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up. – Ray Romano We may not be able to prepare the future for our children, but we can at least prepare our children for the future. – President Franklin D. Roosevelt We spend the first 12 months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next 12 months teaching them to sit down and shut up. – Phyllis Diller We never know the love of the parent till we become parents ourselves. – Henry Ward Beecher There really are places in the heart you don’t even know exist until you love a child. – Anne Lamott, Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son’s First Year Your kids require you most of all to love them for who they are, not to spend your whole time trying to correct them. – Bill Ayers You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. – Franklin P. Adams The best way to keep children at home ...

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How to Parenting Ideas that Work!

How to Parenting Ideas that Work!

There is lots of parenting advice on the internet, but learning how to parenting ideas, ones that you can really use in your situation, is much harder to find.  Facts, figures and opinions abound, but actually finding “how to” information becomes a more difficult prospect. My Top Ten How to Parenting Ideas Here is ten of the best how to parenting ideas I have found… 1. Take the Emotion out of Disciplining When our kids disobey we get angry and this is the worst thing we can do.  A screaming match is a bad way to parent, so one of the best how to parenting ideas is to take the emotion out of the situation, and logically lay out the consequences, without yelling. 2. Make Your Rules Simple Kids need rules, but they need rules that are easy to understand and simple to follow.  Choose your battles, meaning you choose important rules to be harder on and learn to let some of the little things slide by without comment. 3. Make your Rules Clear One of the first excuses you will hear from your child is that they did not understand what they did.  Make your rules clear, and tell them before they transgress.  It is not good coming on heavy afterwards if they have misunderstood, so get it right the first time. 4. Make the Rules and their Consequences Consistent Consistency is the key for how to parenting ideas that work.  You cannot overlook a rule one day and expect to enforce it the next, so make clear rules and stick to the consequences, even if enforcing them is awkward for you. 5. Make Consequences Proportional Kids often have a sense of justice, so they need to feel that the penalties you set are not only fair, but also ...

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Top Ten Bad Parenting Habits to Avoid (Part 3)

Top Ten Bad Parenting Habits to Avoid (Part 3)

Here is the conclusion of your series on Bad Parenting It has been a fun, tongue in cheek look at bad parenting, but you can learn a lot from looking at how NOT to parent your child.  If you missed the previous installments, click here to Start at the first article. 8. The Screaming Match Bad parenting most often results in a screaming match. For both parent and child, frustration and stress on the relationship are often expressed by emotions, and the most common emotion is yelling. Screaming at your child, standing over them or poking your finger at them is rude, demeaning and closes communication with them. It lowers their respect for you and even if you scream but they fall silent, damage is being done which can last a lifetime. Emotions are part of living in a family, and if you’ve had a particularly stressful day it’s not uncommon to feel like you want to scream. However, if you lose your temper you lose the plot, so take a breath, count to 10 and walk away until you are in control of your emotions. Once you are calm enough, sit with your child and discuss the issue, focusing on them not on the problem. Allow them to express their emotions, but take a break if they are getting worked up. If you can calmly express the reasons for your decision without it becoming a screaming match then you have achieved a major victory. Remember, the words you say cannot be retrieved, so take time aside to think and speak rationally and carefully to your child. 9. Criticizing Your Child Experts tell us that criticism and verbal abuse can, like physical abuse, have a slow and negative affect on the development of children. In older kids it can cause ...

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Single Parenting Facts

Single Parenting Facts

These single parenting facts give some insight into how single parents live, and how they cope with the complex and often overwhelming task of parenting as a single mom or dad. Although raw facts do not convey any of the struggle or emotion of being a single parent, they can give us an insight into some of the stereotypical caricatures that have been created concerning especially single moms.  This information provides a timely insight into single parenting and how both moms and dads cope with being single and raising children. The US Census Bureau provided these single parenting facts, and they are current as of November 2009. There are approximately 13.7 million single parents in the United States, and they are responsible for raising around 28.1 million children, which represents 26% of all children in the United States under the age of 21 years old. Around 84% of custodial single parents are mothers and 16% are fathers.  Of the mothers, 45% are currently divorced or separated, while 34.2% have never married at all.  Of the men, 57.8% are divorced or separated and 34.2% have never married. Surprisingly 79.5% of single moms who have their children are employed, 49.8% of them full time.  For single dads who have their children, 90% are gainfully employed. Another interesting single parenting fact is that only 27% of single mothers and 12.9% or single dads live in poverty. Although many picture single moms as young, these single parenting facts reveal that 39.1% are in fact over the age of 40. Typically a single mom is raising one child, with 54% of custodial moms raising one child from the separated parent, while 46% have two or more children with them full time. Being a single parent is never easy, as these single parenting fact bear witness, ...

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Funny Parenting Advice- The Top Ten Laws of Parenting

Funny Parenting Advice- The Top Ten Laws of Parenting

I have lots of funny parenting advice, mainly because I am a funny parent!  I mean, life is funny, and parenting, for all its difficulties, stresses and dramas, is also funny, especially if you step back and have a good hard look at it. So that has given rise to the Top Ten Laws of Funny Parenting Advice! They might be funny, but you will also find that they are true for most families! If you are a stressed out single parent, or overworked working mom, grab a cup of coffee, grab a few minutes alone and enjoy some sensible yet funny parenting advice.  Quick, while you can before the kids wake up! In any group of children, if one child is going to behave badly, it will always be yours.  If several are going to act out, yours will always be among them. If there is a choice between a cheap item and an expensive one, your kid will always want the more expensive one.  In fact, they will often want two of them. The longer you spend cooking for your child, the less they will like the result.  This is a scientific fact, and ranges from hours spent preparing healthy food (which they hate) to party pies, which are ready in minutes (which they love).  The ultimate expression of this is fast food, and we all know how much kids love that! The later you stay up, the earlier your child will get up the next morning.  This especially applies to single parents who have been out on a date the night before. The messier the food, the greater then chance it will finish up on the carpet.  Similarly, the more expensive the carpet, the greater then chance it will finish there, and the less likely you will ...

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Top Ten Bad Parenting Habits to Avoid (Part 2)

This is the second article in our Bad Parenting series! If you missed the previous article, the first 4 points in our Top Ten, Click here to read it now. 4. Love if, Love Because If you really want to show your children bad parenting, try offering them conditional love.  This is a love for them that appears only when they are good or have done something to please you, and it disappears when they have done something to displease you.  So if they are naughty they feel unloved.  It they fail, they feel unloved.  If they are good or well behaved they feel loved.  You get the drift? What you really want to give them is unconditional love, and take every opportunity to show them this unconditional love.  This is a love that exists regardless of what they do or say.  They cannot be bad enough to lose it.  They can’t act out or swear at you or even hit you enough to stop this love from being demonstrated.  It is unconditional, and it is yours to give! Even when you discipline, it must be done in this unconditional love.  They are punished, for example sent to their room.  But when you place them there, say you love them, hug them, but still be strong enough to follow through with the penalty.  Afterwards, hug them and love them to pieces! Many adults bear the scars of never being good enough for their parents, and it often stays with them their whole life, and affects how they relate to others and even their own children.  The cure is unconditional love, so give it and do so liberally!  5. Always Letting Kids Have their Own way Most children are master negotiators, and they tend to start this very early in their ...

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Parenting Techniques for Single Moms

Parenting Techniques for Single Moms

Parenting techniques are an important part of effectively bringing up your child, and this is especially true for the single mom.  Without a partner to help share the load, make the decisions and set out the boundaries for the children, you need to make sure that you are employing the right parenting techniques in the right way, and that you stand firm on these even if your ex is undermining your parenting techniques. Here’s some practical parenting techniques you can start using today 1.    Love your Kids Unconditionally They need to know that their position in your affections is unchanged by any disobedience or disappointments.  They are the center of your world no matter what, and even as you discipline them they need to have total confidence that you love them unconditionally, no matter what! 2.    Ask for Help In poor countries a whole village bring up a child, and so it is with us.  Don’t be so proud as to not ask for help, especially from close family members or close friends.  If none will help you, make sure you enroll your kids in day care or after school to give you a much needed break. 3.    Don’t Play the Bribery Game Divorce usually leads to the ex trying to buy the love of your kids, and you must not be drawn into a bribery match.  You might feel like the bad cop, but giving the child more and more will undermine their moral development.  Talk to your ex and see if they will listen and help parent the children.  If they won’t, ask your support to help and make sure even if you are not the Santa Clause, that your child still feels loved. 4.    Set Firm Boundaries Kids need limits.  They need to know where these limits ...

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Is My Bad Parenting Damaging My Child?

Is My Bad Parenting Damaging My Child?

If you are asking yourself if bad parenting has damaged your children, chances are you are feeling guilty about decisions you have made or discipline you have failed to apply. Your judgment of whether your methods as a parent are effective or not may depend more on what others have said to you rather than on your own assessment or how your kids actually feel. Studies have shown that poor parents can damage the mental development of children and can have long-lasting effects throughout their life. However, there are many adults who have been parented badly in their early years, yet have grown to be productive and successful members of society.  Many of these people have had to work extra hard to overcome their parent’s mistakes, but they have done it and turned their lives around. What Types of Actions can be Categorized as Bad Parenting? Here’s a few of the most damaging parenting traits, so see if you find yourself doing these things regularly… 1. Inconsistency One of the most damaging things you can do to your children is to be inconsistent. When you are inconsistent they live with the uncertainty of how you will react to their actions. One day they will do something naughty and you will laugh at them, but the next day you will react angrily and punish them. This confuses a child and blurs the lines of rules you have set, because they don’t understand why you change so readily. Another area of inconsistency can often be in the consequences children receive. Even if you consistently punish something, you need to be consistent in the penalty. It is no good punishing them sometimes by sending them to their room, when another time they do the same thing you withhold their favorite candy. Learn to ...

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