I have lots of funny parenting advice, mainly because I am a funny parent! I mean, life is funny, and parenting, for all its difficulties, stresses and dramas, is also funny, especially if you step back and have a good hard look at it.
So that has given rise to the Top Ten Laws of Funny Parenting Advice!
They might be funny, but you will also find that they are true for most families!
If you are a stressed out single parent, or overworked working mom, grab a cup of coffee, grab a few minutes alone and enjoy some sensible yet funny parenting advice. Quick, while you can before the kids wake up!
- In any group of children, if one child is going to behave badly, it will always be yours. If several are going to act out, yours will always be among them.
- If there is a choice between a cheap item and an expensive one, your kid will always want the more expensive one. In fact, they will often want two of them.
- The longer you spend cooking for your child, the less they will like the result. This is a scientific fact, and ranges from hours spent preparing healthy food (which they hate) to party pies, which are ready in minutes (which they love). The ultimate expression of this is fast food, and we all know how much kids love that!
- The later you stay up, the earlier your child will get up the next morning. This especially applies to single parents who have been out on a date the night before.
- The messier the food, the greater then chance it will finish up on the carpet. Similarly, the more expensive the carpet, the greater then chance it will finish there, and the less likely you will be to remove it with Carpet Cleaner.
- Backing out of the driveway immediately causes one of your children to need to go to the bathroom.
- Toys multiply to fill the entire floor area of any room or cupboard. Strangely a child can decrease this if they need to clean their room and they are trying to fit the toys under their bed.
- Children cry and throw tantrums louder in areas designated by society as quiet, such as a library or doctor’s office. Conversely, they never cry when there is lots of noise around, like a football match or McDonald’s.
- The best and most guaranteed way to make a child do something is to forbid them to do it. They just can’t help themselves, can they?
- The more stubborn, selfish and difficult a child is to raise, the greater the satisfaction… well, you keep telling yourself this!
So there is out Top Ten Laws of Parenting. Don’t worry, we also have sensible lists all over this site, but we know sometimes you just need a laugh or two. So for sensible advice as opposed to funny parenting advice, check around the rest of our website.