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Parenting for Dummies: A Not-So-Dumb Top Ten

Parenting for Dummies: A Not-So-Dumb Top Ten

Parenting for dummies is probably a bit condescending as a title, but the purpose of this article is to strip away the mystique of being a parent.  In its purest form, parenting should be pretty straight forward, but the truth is that, in the heat of the battle with our kids, it becomes almost overwhelming! Hence the term, “for dummies”.  I want to strip away the smoke and mirrors and get back to the basics of how you can be a great parent, in a way that anyone, including a first time novice, should be able to apply. So here is our not-so-dumb Top Ten of Parenting for Dummies (and also smart people like you!) 1. Set Limits Parenting starts with setting sensible limits, and attaching sensible consequences to them.  Boundaries should be put in place and this will be dependent on the age of the children.  Pick your battles, and don’t put rules in place for things that are trivial, save it for the important ones.  So have a rule in place for staying out beyond curfew, but avoid making a Federal Case of the child not brushing their teeth. 2. Set Consequences Consequences need to make sense and be proportional.  For example a perfect consequence for staying out late would be grounding the child. Don’t set a consequence that just frustrates the child, or that is perceived as unfair or inappropriate, such as spanking a child for hitting another child.  Do not threaten consequences you will not or cannot keep to, so avoid saying things like, “If you do that again I will kill you!” 3. Follow Through If you set a consequence, follow through every single time, or you will consider yourself a real dummy in the long run!  Even if you don’t want to, even if ...

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Top Ten Parenting Solutions for Working Moms and Dads

Top Ten Parenting Solutions for Working Moms and Dads

If you are single and working, you need to think about parenting solutions, especially if you are a full time worker.  Modern society can be very insular, but what is still true in the 21st Century is that a child is raised by a village, not an individual, and this is especially true for the single mom or dad who is working.   Our Top Ten Parenting Solutions can give you Insight and Ideas!   Here is our Top Ten of Parenting Solutions for working moms and dads, and hopefully this will help you to take control of the parenting situation.  This also colors how you see your work environment, and while all of these are not applicable to all workplaces, you may have to change your job situation for the benefit of your family.   1. Seek Help from Your Family or Friends A single parent must not be an island, so look at your immediate family and friends and see if there is anyone you can trust who can share the load of caring for the children. Can you coordinate times with your mom, or with a close friend who knows and loves your children? 2. Share the Load Pooling resources is a common and one of the most very effective parenting solutions.  If you know other single parents who are working, then you can pool your resources and coordinate times and jobs so that sometimes you mind their kids, and other times they mind yours.  It is a mutual exchange of child minding services, but again you need to be able to trust them. 3. Try to Obtain Flexible Hours at Work Many jobs can be made flexible, and if you are a good worker your employers will be inclined to do all they can to help ...

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Top Ten Positive Parenting Skills for the Single Parent

Top Ten Positive Parenting Skills for the Single Parent

The power of positive parenting skills is the power of being able to influence the life of your child for good, and for ever.  It believes that, despite the challenges of parenting, the journey can be fun and fulfilling, and that you can discipline your children in loving and positive ways. It is the ability as a single parent to fulfill both mom and dad roles, and to influence your children to help them become successful, happy and well-adjusted adults one day.   The Difficulty of Positive Parenting Skills for the Single Parent   As a single parent, one of the great difficulties you face in applying positive parenting skills is the lack of consistency, especially if the children visit with your ex.  You have little control over what they teach, how they teach them or the standards they apply to them.   You also have little or no control over the way they speak to the children.  If your ex is miserable or depressed, they may be tearing the kids down every other weekend, while you are madly trying to be positive and speak uplifting words to them.   This makes the task of parenting more difficult but not impossible.  But if this is the case with your ex-partner, you must remain positive and loving for your children as they grow and develop.  Here are some suggestions on how you can develop your own positive parenting skills to harness the power for your single parent family.  1. Get Support Don’t try to do everything on your own!  Gather close family or friends, or reach out to a support group.  If you cannot find these, pay for childcare or after school care, but get some sort of support to help share the time demands and emotional load. 1. Talk to ...

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Teenage Mothers Help Restore Faith in Teenagers

Teenage Mothers Help Restore Faith in Teenagers

Most people think that most often teenage mothers help establish the idea that all teenagers are self centered, lazy and useless, but this could not be further from the truth!  Sure, there may be some who fit the image of laziness and selfishness, but there are also those who provide a very positive image, if you have eyes to see it! Which Teenage Mothers Help Restore the Teenage Image? Young mothers are most often single.  They have most often experimented with sex as a teenager, as many teenagers do, and they have fallen pregnant.  They may have been young when they fell pregnant, but they made a decision to have a child and bring up a child and most often they do this recognizing that they will have to commit 20 years of their life to the task.  They also know that there is little in the way of teenage mothers help, so they are taking on a big task These teenage mothers help destroy the stereotype of selfishness and laziness.  While their friends are out there partying, many of these girls forego this and make a commitment to put their child first. On occasions they may get their mom to mind the child and they can still go out, but often they ignore the peer pressure and put their child first.  For a young mother this is hard, and when they decide to commit to their child, they are required to grow up awfully fast. Our image of teenagers varies according to the teens we know.  Your view of teenagers in general will be different if you are an avid churchgoer, verse if you live in a ghetto.  However, seeing teenage mothers as selfish, promiscuous, immature burdens to society is grossly unfair to the girls who are determined to ...

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