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Tag Archives: parenting issues with children

Young Single Mothers are Better than Their Reputation

Young Single Mothers are Better than Their Reputation

Without a doubt young single mothers have a less than stellar reputation when it comes to disciplining children and raising a family. Many people in our society look down on them, but I believe that young single mothers deserve our support, not our scorn, and that if we give them our support they can create successful families. Why are Young Single Mothers So Maligned? Young single mothers are often viewed as being “kids having kids”, and many look down on them because they assume they are promiscuous or stupid falling pregnant. However, it should be recognised that many young people are having sex, often with multiple partners, yet not all of these girls become mothers. Like most young people, girls think they are bullet proof and live the same lifestyle as everybody else, until something goes wrong and they discover that they are pregnant. Many of these girls do not abort their baby, but bravely face a future as a single mom, including the social stigma and the implications for their own dreams and desires in life. These girls should not be looked upon as whores but rather as heroes! What Single Mothers Give Up Young single mothers have to grow up quickly. They may have been fooling around and carefree when they fell pregnant, but they have to face the reality of a completely different life for the sake of their child.   1. They Give Up Fun! Most young mothers have to make the decision to give up fun, not being able to go out with their friends partying and relaxing. They may have their child minded occasionally, but the overall carefree lifestyle of youth has passed away for them.   2. They Give Up Their Dreams Most young girls have dreams for the future, and most of ...

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The Single Parent Families Lifestyle

The Single Parent Families Lifestyle

The single parent families lifestyle may be a unique and fascinating one. In shared child custody this runs specifically true, and the children may appear as if they are living a double life.  This lifestyle can be difficult for adults, never mind for a child, so the strains on single parent families and their lifestyle is most often higher than on other families, even though all sides love the kids. The Duality of the Single Parent Families Lifestyle Children seem to be living wholly different lives with each of the parents.  But somehow you are required to face and beat this manner of life for your children! Here I will discuss three areas you possibly can work on to try and minimize the potentially destructive nature of the single parent families lifestyle… Divide and Conquer The kids specialty, and especially in messy or nasty divorces.  Youngsters are experts at dividing and conquering the mother and father even in regular families, playing mom off against dad to get what they need.  This is even more extreme for separated parents because of the fact that the parents are already divided! The solution: You and your ex will need to start communicating on the critical issues.  If you can’t stand each other, it’s time to determine that you love the kids enough to put them first and at least start texting!  If you communicate you can make sure that the kid is not playing one of you off against the other and prevent a tragedy people and unaware couples in your situation face daily! Disciplining verses Fun It is possible that one parent might be fun but the other has got to discipline?  This could happen even in marriage or if couples stay together, so how much more for you.  But this method ...

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How to Have a Good Parent-Child Relationship

How to Have a Good Parent-Child Relationship

Having a good parent-child relationship is something everyone strives for, both on the parental side and also on the child’s side. But it involves much more than just being popular with your children, because a truly great a good parent-child relationship is like a teabag… It’s true color comes out when it’s in hot water! Top 5 Mistakes that Stop Singles Having a Good Parent-Child Relationship As a single mom or dad it is certainly possible to have a good parent-child relationship, but many single parents make some classic mistakes in this area.   1. Trying to Be Their Friend It is great to love your child and wonderful to relate well to them. It is also great when they share even their most intimate thoughts with you because they trust you. However, your children do not need you as a friend, they need you as a parent. You can still relate well to them, love them and have them trust you, but it cannot be as a friend it needs to be someone they look up to and respect, and that’s what parenting is about. At some point your teenage son or daughter will choose to be with their friends over you, and that’s okay. The worst thing you can do is to force your friendship on the, especially in the company of their other friends. Love them, be close to them, be absolutely trustworthy, but don’t be a friend be mom or dad. 2. Manipulating Them Singles in general and particularly single moms are very prone to manipulating their children. In a healthy relationship, if you want them to do something you need to simply ask honestly and openly, not manipulate them or use a guilt trip to have your children obey you. You may feel like the ...

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Top 6 Trials of Shared Parenting

Top 6 Trials of Shared Parenting

Shared parenting is a difficult thing, and especially so if you and your ex have a rocky or volatile relationship. However, if you are determined to provide the right environment for your children, and if you are prepared to work together rather than against one another, shared parenting can be a great arrangement, both for yourself and the kids. However, it also introduces a number of issues that you need to work on collectively with your ex-partner, and failing to do this can lead to a complete breakdown in your relationship with your kids over time as you attempt to parent together. Here are the Top 6 Shared Parenting Hurdles you need to overcome in order to Become Successful Parents your children… 1. Never Speak Negatively About the Other Parent I know it’s tempting, but as much as you can you need to not speak ill of your ex to your child, no matter what they say or do, what arrangements they make or how much you or the children don’t think they care. Many separated couples use the children as a means to attack the other adult, and this not only alienates them, but it causes deep mistrust between you and your ex-partner. 2. Communicate about Rules No matter how much you dislike your ex, you need to be in communication with them and present a united parenting front to the children with regards family rules or laws. Frequently in cases of shared parenting, each household develops a different set of rules after the separation, but you will be well served to change communication with each other and make sure that your arrangements like what time they go to bed or what time they have to be home by are uniform, no matter which household they are staying at. ...

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Facing the Key Issues with Single Parent Families

Facing the Key Issues with Single Parent Families

If you are single and have kids you will realize that there are issues with single parent families.  All families have issues, but in single parent families these issues can be magnified or minified, depending on the parent involved and a number of other factors.   Facing the facts is an important aspect of improving your situation as a single parent. Many families suggest that in a lot of cases being involved in a single parent family is preferable to a dual parent situation, especially if the previous arrangement was abusive.   All families have thing they need to work through, and the issues with single parent families are in many ways no different to two parent families.  Of course, because you are a single parent, there are some pressures that your family will face which are unique to your situation, and here are a few of those you must think about…   Single Parent family Issues to Consider   Rules Families need rules, and single parent families will experience issues with regards the application of these rules.  Having only one parent at the helm means that rules are made with less people involved, and you need to make rule in consultation with your kids.  Set up rules and attach a consequence to them that is fair and reasonable in your children’s eyes.   Discipline One of the real issues of single parent families is that it is harder to apply consistent discipline because you cannot share the load.  This means you need to be on your game every day, and sometimes it just gets hard to be that consistent.  Add to this the very real issue that your ex may be undermining your efforts at discipline and you may have a touchy, difficult and painful situation on your hands. ...

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How do Single Parent Families Affect Children?

How do Single Parent Families Affect Children?

It is well recognized that single parent families affect children, but it can work in both a positive and a negative way.  On the TV Talk Shows, you will see all of the negative effects, but there are some positives that can make single parent families a positive experience for a child.   One positive way in which single parent families affect children is in the area of time.  Without the added distraction of a partner, many single parents choose to devote themselves to their children rather than spending time with their partner.   For children, time is an important way of saying, “I love you!”  If you never spend any quality time with your children, they begin to feel that you are ignoring them and are more interested in your own life than in theirs.  Many single moms I know love having girl’s nights with their kids, enjoying movies and popcorn or pamper nights in a way they simply would not pursue if the dad was around.   One Hidden Positive Affect on Children of Single Parent Families   One of the hidden positives ways that Single Parent Families Affect Children is if the other partner is abusive.  Many women feel they need to stay with an abusive husband for the kids, to keep the family together, but most often the children are much better serving in a single parent family, away from the abuse of the ex-partner.   One Hidden Negative Affect on Children of Single Parent Families   Families were designed to have two parents, and both men and women can bring positives to the equation.  One of the hidden negative ways that Single Parent Families affect children is in the lack of a positive role model.  Many single moms find that their children have real difficulty relating ...

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Top Ten Ways of Facing Parenting Issues with Children

Top Ten Ways of Facing Parenting Issues with Children

If you are facing parenting issues with children you probably need to stop, take a good look at yourself and how you manage the children, and see if you are making wise decisions.   Hindsight is always 20/20 vision and this is especially true for parenting issues with children.  It is easier to look back on a situation with your kids and know exactly what you should have said and should not have said, but in the heat of the moment parenting becomes a much more difficult issue!   If you are facing parenting issues with your children, think about these ideas…   1. Talk to Them Make sure you keep lines of communication open.  Talking to your kids can make all the difference, especially when explaining the reasons for disciplining them.   2. Be Strong When you make a parenting decision, don’t be easily swayed by complaints from your child.  If you make a decision, consult them but in the long run your decision should stand.   3. Big Them Up Make sure you speak positive words to your children, especially in front of others.  Never complain about them to others in their presence because it is embarrassing and will build resentment to your parenting.   4. Be Fair In all parenting issues with children you need to be perceived as fair, not unreasonable or petty.   5. Make Consequences Just Make sure that the consequences for disobedience are just and in proportion to the offence.  Consequences should also alight with the offence, so staying out after curfew for example is best deal with by grounding for a week rather than the removal of another privilege.   6. Be Consistent The biggest issue parenting children is in the area of consistency.  You need to follow through every single time, ...

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